Since the birth of Baby Girl in May, I’ve found myself saying a few odd things as I introduce her to the world around us. So before she starts coming out with her own cute quotables, I thought I’d jot down my own nonsense for posterity:
- Upon seeing her stare at my ‘Yorkshire’ tea towel for ten minutes “That’s a tea-towel. It’s from Yorkshire, where Mummy’s from. Daddy’s from Congo. We don’t have any tea towels from Congo.”
- “This vest has Winnie the Pooh on it. We like Winnie the Pooh. We don’t rate his spelling, though.”
- Introducing her to the contents of the fridge: “This is an egg.” She reaches for it to suck it. “No we don’t suck it, it’s come out of a chicken’s bottom.”
- Singing along to her Jumperoo: “Froggy went a-courtin’ he did ride ah-em… Froggy went a-courtin’ he did ride with sword and pistol by is side… Froggy was a violent boyfriend wasn’t he?”
- “I know you prefer to be naked but being clothed is more socially acceptable”.
And there’ll be more, I’m sure. What nonsense have you found yourself saying to your newborn?